i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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