We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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