Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ttyl tear gas
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize