We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Pants are for mortals
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