My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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