I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
