In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
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