glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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