I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
