i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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