I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
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