Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
