sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
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