Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
21 MILFs That Made The Boys Crazy
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
23 Ladies Who Have Mastered The Art Of Squirting
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now