Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
