Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
