So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
