i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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