I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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