my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
The convent might be a nice break from real life
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
