The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
