im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRING THE BAGELS
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize