do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize