so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize
