can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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