Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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