I hate your face
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
