he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
