dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
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why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
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Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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