physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
