even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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