SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!