Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize