Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
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