Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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