dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize