She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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