Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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