You really coming over, don't trick.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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