Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
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