And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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