He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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