is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
