his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
