my mouth tastes like poor choices
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize
