So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize