Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
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we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
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If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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