Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Randomize
