i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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