last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
