Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
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If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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