There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like giving head to a cactus.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize